Recently, a slew of internet articles have popped up declaring many standard parenting phrases now to be wrong. I’m sure you’ve seen the articles; they’re usually in list-form, containing 9-11 phrases that you’re never supposed to say… phrases I use with quasi-regularity.
So naturally, I found myself wondering: Am I a bad parent? I mean, I’m just a mom doing her best to raise a couple of decent human beings. I’m not an expert; I’m a nobody. What do I know? Perhaps you read some of the same articles and nursed similar concerns about your own parenting.
Well I’ve done some thinking about these lists, and I’m calling bull. The following is a list of the top ten most-common things experts tell us we shouldn’t say to our kids, and why I think they’re wrong:
1. “I know you can try harder” – This is a mean thing to say because your child probably already is trying his hardest. Instead, when your child goes above and beyond, lavish praise upon him. Your positive reinforcement will be so inspirational that he’ll soon learn to always try his hardest. Praise is like crack for kids. Do not ever let him know you’re disappointed in him.