This weekend, the greatest upset in college football wasn’t USC’s win over 3rd ranked Utah or Georgia Tech beating #9 Florida State. In fact, it didn’t happen on a football field at all. It happened on a street of Stillwater, Oklahoma, on the campus of Oklahoma State University when a drunk driver careened into a mass of spectators during the university’s homecoming parade. What should have been a joyous time quickly turned to chaos. It was a tragedy.
Three adults were pronounced dead at the scene, a two-year-old died at the hospital and of the 47 people injured by the accident, 11 were under the age of 13. We’re talking about children, flying through the air, being run down in their buggies, adults jumping in front of them. Children.
I can’t even begin to describe the pain I feel for these families and this community. My husband is a proud Oklahoma State University alumni, I am a former employee and my children are exuberant fans (Doodle would wear his “Pissal Peep” shirts every day if I did laundry enough!) We are of loyal members of the Oklahoma State University family despite living across the country and this tragedy hits us hard.
Hubby and I took on life on our own in Oklahoma. Fresh out of college, we set out on our own, moving the more than 1200 miles to Oklahoma City. We’ve lived a lot of places and never in my life have we found a greater community and generous, kindhearted and wonderful people than we met in Oklahoma.
During our two years in Oklahoma, we were involved in Oklahoma State University’s activities. Despite living almost an hour away, we attended almost every home football game and hubby stood in line for a whole day to get coveted season tickets for the basketball season. We showed off the gorgeous campus to anyone who visited. There was always a buzz of excitement and pride on campus any time we visited. We loved partaking in the long-standing homecoming traditions and festivities (known as “America’s Greatest Homecoming Celebration” which started more than 100 years ago) and we went to that parade more than once, that last time when Honeybun was just over a year old and the last time I visited Oklahoma.
Drunk driving accidents are, unfortunately, not rare. And this accident which affect so many children and families was not a case of college partying gone wrong, the driver was a 23-year-old local woman. It was 10:30 in the morning. I just don’t get it.
I don’t understand drinking at 10 o’clock in the morning. I don’t get why people drink and drive. I don’t know why people make the choice to endanger other people’s lives. I don’t know why people don’t rest it out, call a taxi, a friend or simply plan ahead with a designated driver.
I’ve been a designated driver as long as I’ve been a driver. As a teen, I was a default DD for my parents anytime they drank more than a glass of wine at dinner as a matter of precaution. And while I never minded, I made the choice to continue being a DD throughout my college years and into adulthood because unfortunately, this tragedy at Oklahoma State University is not my first personal drunk driving tragedy.
I was thrust into real life on the day I became an adult when, on my 18th birthday (14 years ago next month), my life was first impacted by drunk driving.
I remember it all so vividly. The lights flashing in the night, the feeling of despair and helplessness. The loss of another young life, someone I knew. The pain and agony of a grieving family.
It’s an experience, though, that I’ve carried with me. It has shaped who I’ve become, the choices I’ve made and how I live my life. It’s made me a better person by reminding me of what is truly important in life. It reminds me everyday how my choices affect others. The heartbreak of those around me has taught me to value not only my own life, but those of everyone I pass by. I choose not to endanger other people’s lives by drinking or in any other way.
And I know Oklahoma State University will come out of this the same way: stronger, better, united. Because while they are no strangers to tragedy (having also suffered two plane crashes in the recent past), they have proven to be fighters. And while I may not be Oklahoma born, I am Oklahoma proud and thankful I got to call this amazing place and wonderful community “home” if only for a few short years. Oklahoma and Oklahoma State University will always be in my heart.
Our thoughts are with our Oklahoma State University family right now and always.
(This post first ran on Beyond Mommying)
About the author: Melissa is a homeschooling, ballerina mommy of four and lives by the motto “Life is never boring when you’re never alone, but I know somewhere out there, there is life Beyond Mommying!” She shares her parenting adventures on her blog Beyond Mommying. You can also find her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram.
