Believe it or not, they’ve eaten (or had a food fight, or stuffed it under the couch cushions), they’ve bathed (or drank all the bath water), splashed suds everywhere (except their own bodies), and they’ve finally fallen asleep, all cozy in their beds.

What to do now? You’ve been dreaming of this moment all day, but now faced with just a few hours before you yourself face-plant into bed, how can you make the most of it?

1. Pop in a load of laundry. Then panic about whether or not it will be done before you go to bed. If you’re lucky, it will finish on time and you can spend the rest of your night folding it. If you’re unlucky, it will go on an epic voyage tumble dry cycle and won’t finish in time, and wrinkly clothes will greet you in the morning.

2. Sweep the floor. With no pitter-patter of tiny, dirty, crumb-leaving footsteps to get in the way, you can clean every floor in the house. You’ll win the “Housekeeper of the Year” award! The floors will be clean enough to eat off of! Until tomorrow morning, 2.3 nanoseconds after the kids wake up, and the floors have somehow already reached Apocalypse-Level Disgusting.

3. Bake brownies. Not the pot kind (unless… do you have any?). Either way, you now have time to bake a whole pan and they will be YOURS, ALL YOURS! Now you just have to make them, clean up the mess, wash the 42 dishes, and stare at the timer, wishing them to be done sooner so you can actually eat and digest them before bed. Pro tip: Sneak them out of the oven as soon as the edges are baked, serve yourself some piping hot brownie slivers, then slide the disfigured mess back in to worry about later. Mmmm, chocolate.

4. Catch up on your email. Then get distracted by an article about leggings or vaccines or belly wraps, and blow through the rest of your free time without clearing a single email from your inbox.

5. Exercise. Hit the treadmill or go for a walk… Ha, I can’t even finish that sentence with a straight face.

6. Take a shower. You’ll have all the time in the world to suds up, deep-condition your hair, maybe even squeeze in a three-month-overdue shave. Then again, it can wait until tomorrow, right? I mean, you won’t get that dirty in your sleep.

7. Get a little nooky. Saunter up to your husband, who’s been relaxing on the couch, and give him the “wanna do you-know-what?” eye. Then look closer and realize he’s not responding to this incredible offer because he already passed out in front of the TV.

8. Curl up next to hubby and catch some zzz’s until it’s time to do it all again tomorrow.


Vicki Lesage proves daily that raising two French kids isn't as easy as the hype lets on. In her three minutes of spare time per week, she writes, sips bubbly, and prepares for the impending zombie apocalypse. She lives in Paris with her French husband, rambunctious son, and charming daughter, all of whom mercifully don't laugh when she says "au revoir." She penned two books, Confessions of a Paris Party Girl and Confessions of a Paris Potty Trainer, in between diaper changes and wine refills. She writes about the ups and downs of life in Paris at

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