My Spanish husband has a saying: “A day’s a day.” The gist behind it is simple and straightforward enough – it’s basically just a variant on the “one day never hurt anyone” concept which we all know, love, and employ regularly. My husband and I love this saying, and we use it a LOT, mainly to justify things like:

  • Fatty foods
  • Meals out
  • Expensive purchases
  • Fatty foods
  • Procrastinating
  • Not exercising
  • Fatty foods and
  • Fatty foods

If you’re confused as to exactly what I mean, here’s an example of my husband and I using “a day’s a day” in context, with respect to our particular weakness (fatty foods):

Him: “Want Indian food for dinner?”
Me: “Yes, but we just had it two days ago.”
Him: “A day’s a day.”
Me: “Sold.”

See? It’s amazing.

Unfortunately, there’s one major problem with the saying “a day’s a day,” which is the fact that it’s inherently a flawed construct. Yes, one day never hurt anyone — but it doesn’t work if you’re falling back on that reasoning Every. Single. Day. Which my husband and I tend to do. And it’s our experience that relying on the “a day’s a day” logic so much that you can’t remember when a day wasn’t a day is the point when a rustic Old World saying becomes less of a saying and more of a… you know.

Incredibly destructive lifestyle.

So. To avoid that outcome, you have to use the “a day’s a day” motto sparingly, with regards to all aspects of life, but particularly when it comes to parenting. Oh, didn’t I mention that it applies to parenting? Because sweet zombie Jesus, you bet it does. You may think it doesn’t, and it probably shouldn’t, but believe me.

It does.

We have all – every single one of us – experienced the “a day’s a day” parenting moments that I like to refer to as Fuck It Days. You know what I’m talking about. Every parent knows those days well. They’re the days when television and video games do the babysitting. They’re the days when Chef Boyardee does the cooking. They’re the days when “eh, whatever” does the disciplining. They’re Fuck It Days.

My personal Fuck It Days – my “a day’s a day” kind of parenting days – have a whole host of triggers. Illness is an obvious one, as is exhaustion. Those are understandable. But I’ve also been led into the sweet, enthralling clutches of a Fuck It Day by way of crippling depression, social anxiety, cabin fever, overwhelming workload, too many snow days in a row, seasonal affective disorder, and yes, I’ll admit it – sheer laziness. What’s more, I know I’m not the only one, because in the same way that “a day’s a day,” it’s also true that a mom’s a mom, and sometimes there’s only so much a mom can do.

In case there are some readers out there who aren’t 100% sure what actually qualifies a day as a Fuck It Day, I’ve prepared some examples to help you more fully understand. Because I’m bomb like that.

  1. You make your kid a snack, then hand her your smart phone, a portable video game system, and the remote control to the television. “Mommy’s going to lie down on the couch for a minute,” you say, and wake up two and a half hours later with a Goldfish stuck to the dried drool on your face. That’s a Fuck It Day.
  2. Your kid hasn’t had a bath in 24 hours and you need to send him to school in the morning. Do you get up early and make sure he gets a shower, or do you sleep late, waking up with just enough time to wipe off his face, run a brush through his hair, dust off the biggest dandruff flakes, and call it good? SMASH goes the snooze button! That’s a Fuck It Day.
  3. Your kid gives you some major lip. She’s been doing that a lot lately, and you’ve been working hard to stay consistent with your discipline. Today though? You couldn’t give any amount of fucks. You give her the double-barrel middle finger behind her back and go off to have a nice long bath (with expensive bath products and possibly a waterproof adult toy.) That’s a Fuck It Day.
  4. You could make a healthy dinner for your children that is aesthetically pleasing and incorporates every food group… or you could order a pizza. Pepperoni, with stuffed crust please! That’s a Fuck It Day.

There are many more examples of Fuck It Days, of course, but hopefully this list is more than enough to give you an idea of what “a day’s a day” parenting looks like. And like I said – no parent can get away with this kind of parenting all the time. It’s not good for you and it’s not good for the kids. But it’s also not good to try too hard to *avoid* the occasional Fuck It Day. All of us need to decompress sometimes. All of us need to be lazy, unhealthy pieces of shit from time to time. And it’s perfectly okay. After all, a day’s a day!

Now where are those Dove bars? I’m thinking of having one or three.


Sarah del Rio is a comedy writer whose award-winning humor blog est.1975 brings snark, levity, and perspective to the ladies of Generation X. Despite being a corporate refugee with absolutely no formal training in English, journalism, or writing of any kind, Sarah earns her daily bread as a freelance writer and editor. She has also contributed to several anthologies, including I STILL Just Want to Pee Alone, the latest installment in the national-bestselling I Just Want to Pee Alone series. Sarah contributes regularly to BLUNTMoms and has made frequent appearances on The Huffington Post Best Parenting Tweets of the Week List. She has also been featured on Scary Mommy, In the Powder Room, and the Erma Bombeck Writer's Workshop. You can also follow Sarah on her blog est.1975 and on Facebook and Twitter.


    • I took my son to McDonalds and the grocery store. Now he’s playing games on his tablet. As Tenacious D says: “Not too bad, good enough.” Ha!

      Thanks for checking in, girl 🙂

  1. Love the detail of the stuffed crust pizza. Because, yeah. When “a day’s a day,” go big or go home. Now I want pizza.

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