I like to think I am a unique flower in some ways. I also like to think that some of my more idiotic blunders are universally achieved. Please tell me these sound familiar to you…
I grate a vegetable -> I immediately shred the skin off of 2.5 knuckles and have to gingerly pick out the pieces of cauliflower dotted with my blood.
I pluck my eyebrows -> I discover a pimple from the Mesozoic Era hiding in the left one that, when gently prodded, explodes all over the mirror.
I flop into bed, eyes aching and go to turn my phone off -> I spend 67 minutes scrolling through Instagram, getting either jealous, hungry, annoyed or inspired and then have nightmares about never doing what I ever want to do ever.
For even more ways that we could be clumsy soul-mates, read the rest of this article on missteenussr.com.
