They Know Not What They Do

This season Manulife is creating a movement of gratitude and paying it forward kindness during the Christmas season. We hope that by sharing our stories of #LifeAdvice and #gratitude we can amplify the conversation and encourage more people to think of sharing these types of kind gestures over the holidays. 

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At almost 6 feet tall, and a huge supporter of our “Mock Parliament” in high school, I never oozed popularity. I didn’t understand the cliques or care to try and decipher the rules for getting along with them.  I knew I wasn’t overly “popular,” but I didn’t let it get under my skin.

My parents told me time and time again as I was growing up: “Just ignore them”. That advice coupled with, “it’s not you, it’s them,” allowed me to stay my path, and not be crushed in the face of bullies.

And there were many.  I was never shoved in a locker or physically harmed; girls don’t often do that. I know if had I attempted to work my way into their group, I am sure I would have been able.  I suffered the “lack of inclusion” bullying.  You know the kind: when there just isn’t room at the table for one more (they would all be so squished) or when all the teams are picked, in silence, before you even understand that teams are happening.

So, I followed the advice “Just Ignore Them” and I learned how to put blinders on to focus on my own progress.  I committed to my things, and the projects I loved. I traveled the world, never worrying about what I was leaving behind. 

I ignored them. 

I have seen the same thing start to happen to my daughter. Not unpopular, but not popular either, she marches to her own beat. Where my pants were always a little too short, hers may be a little “uncool” as well. 

And I am passing along the same advice that I was given. 
Just ignore them darling, they know not what they do.

And through that I tell her to keep her passions in view, and work hard towards her goals, and not worry so much about what other people think or say. To be her very best, to be kind and loving and never harm, but also, never submit to someone else’s ideas of who you are, or what you should do. 

These people never go away and even as a 40 year old I tell myself to “Just ignore them” frequently. The chatter in the background doesn’t matter, it is what is happening on the stage that should be your focus. 

And even though I can still hear the noise, (despite my attempts to ignore) I move forward in my life with a determination that would scatter the naysayers like so many bowling pins.  And, from it all, being able to filter through the noise has made me a stronger person. A more confident person.  Myself. 

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Visit the Manulife blog for more details on what they are doing to share gratitude this month, or pop onto the #LifeAdvice hashtag on Twitter and start sharing the best life advice YOU have received! 

This post is sponsored by SPLASH Media Engagement on behalf of Manulife. 

@Manulife is asking you to spread some positive by thanking those in your life who have given you great #LifeAdvice. Take a moment to #PayItForward by thanking someone important to you.