“Oh, your internet friends?”

“Hey, ‘Facebook!’ How’s it hangin’?”

“Oh, you BLOGGERS!”

These are all phrases that have jokingly been shot in my direction since I’ve become a writer/blogger/teller-of-all-too-much.

“I see your green light on! I know you’re on Facebook all the time!”

10-4, Stalker McStalkerson.

Allow me to let you in on a little something. Us “bloggers,” or as many like to call us “24/7 Facebookers,” do this for many reasons. I shouldn’t have to justify the reasons that I, or any of my friends do what we do, but out of my own annoyance, I’ve decided to enlighten some of you.

Have you ever seen an article on your Facebook timeline with a heart tugging title, clicked over, and shed three hundred tears while you clung on to every word? Or just about wet yourself over some laugh-out-loud piece about a woman’s detailed account of a Brazilian wax gone wrong? If so, let me guess! Sometimes you even share those posts on your own personal Facebook wall with an added sentiment, such as: “OMG, you MUST read this. SO GOOD!” 

Guess what? That’s us.

Those stories you read, the articles you share, the beautifully and hilariously written words that pull on your heart’s strings or give you your daily dose of laughter, that’s us. We write those articles.

BLUNTmoms, Scary Mommy, Huffington Post, xoJane, Washington Post, Motherlode; the author’s names delicately tucked under the title of those posts you read, that’s us

Those “bloggers,” those “Facebookers,” those are my friends and me.

Some may label our blogging as a silly hobby or some lame attention-seeking attempt as many super kind commentators leave in our hard work’s wake. However, I’d imagine that if I posted to my personal Facebook page that I started writing for the Sunday paper in the obituary section, I’d hear deafening internet applause.

I’ve become fairly accustomed to random jabs here and there and silly remarks that I know are harmless in essence, but after a while, they do get to you. They shouldn’t, but they do.

I don’t mock your Etsy shop creations or your endlessly shared gourmet food photos, because that is what you enjoy.

At least, I’m assuming so. 

A while back a blogger girlfriend invited me out for a girls night with a bunch of her friends. Over drinks, the two of us were shooting the shit and talking about a few submissions we had sent out. We talked about how we were eagerly anticipating the editorial responses.

One of the girls from the group overheard our conversation, turned to us, and said: “Oh, YOU BLOGGERS!!” in a silly, sarcastic, and non-assuming malevolent tone. I know she meant no malice; it was clear she didn’t. However, to be honest, it bugged me. It hurt my feelings, as silly as that may sound.

I didn’t know a whole lot about blogging just over a year ago. I would post my goofy rants and stories to my personal Facebook wall and after being told multiple times to start a blog, I decided to follow through.

Over the course of this past year, I’ve come to learn that my writing, my craft, if you will, is a gift. It’s something to be proud of, something I am proud of. However, most of all, I’ve realized it is something that makes me happy. 

My Facebook ‘green light’ is on because I am in Facebook groups learning; I am exploring new opportunities and ways to further my craft. I am being schooled in Facebook messages by my editors on how to hone my grammar. I am reading; I am reading A LOT. I am learning, but most of all, I am having the time of my life. 


Writing my stories–silly, funny, serious–it is my personal slice of joy in a chaotic life that we all lead.

There are more supportive people out there than non-supportive ones, and for that, I am grateful. However, to the ones who like to rain on our parade with your seemingly harmless comments? I ask you to think about your passions.

What drives you? What makes you happy?

If your happiness comes in the form of selling nail wraps, making candles, creating culinary masterpieces, writing poetry, hand knitting baby items or re-creating the Mona Lisa in Lego form in your spare time, I respect you. I respect your craft, and most of all, your passion.

We, us “bloggers,” do this because we enjoy it, we find happiness in putting our “funny,” our “sad,”  our “mad,” our stories into words and putting it out there. It may not be a craft that has a tangible outcome like a pair of knitted baby booties, but to us, it is equally as gratifying.


Ashley Alteman is known for her love of dinosaurs, ponies wearing sweaters, and overuse of commas. She is an editor’s nightmare. She won a spelling bee in the 8th grade for correctly spelling “carrot” and knew from that moment she was destined to be an amazing journalist, or a sarcastic blogger; she went with the latter. Ashley details her laugh-out-loud parenting and personal fails at SmashleyAshley.com. You can also find this hot mess fumbling around on Facebook


  1. You summed this up perfectly and over the course of the three plus years I have been blogging, I have totally heard my fair share of this from non-blogging friends and acquaintances. It does hurt and have learned to tune them out as best as I can. What always gets me though is it is our articles that they same people end up sharing all over their Facebook walls that they seem to make light of. I agree though my writing and blogging is so very gratifying and try my best to remember that when these types of jabs get hurled at me.

    • Yeah, it’s sort of strange, isn’t it? It’s almost taboo to discuss amongst some crowds. Very odd. At the end of the day, as you said, writing is gratifying and remembering that when people give you those little digs is what keeps you going. Not to mention, all the support you receive from the blogging community, like these amazingly kind comments I awoke to here this morning! So, thank-you!! 🙂

  2. Oh, so much “AMEN, SISTAH!!” on this one! Most important words: “However, most of all, I’ve realized it is something that makes me happy. ” I am sharing this with my small little world because I, too, feel the snarky, stabby blog knife twist a little each time someone points out I ‘live’ on FB.

    The rest you already know, I love you deeply, madly and I don’t care what people say about it!! Hahahaha xoxoxoxoxo

    • Oh Mary. You make me happy. Thank-you so much for your incredibly kind words. I feel the exact same way about you, my sweet friend.

  3. Thank you for writing this. I’ve experienced many of these same comments and you addressed them perfectly. We do what we do because we love it – and you’re right, that’s reason enough.

  4. So proud to be one of your blog friends! Thank the heavens our crazy bloggy lives brought is together!

    • Yes! Amen to that! What a wild journey the past year has been! Couldn’t have made it through without my BBFL!!! 🙂 xo

  5. Absolutely! I feel so honoured everyday to have met some of the Blogger’s and chronic FaceBooker’s I have. Thanks for this, shared everywhere I can share!

    • Me too! So SO many amazing people have come into my life because of this. I think so many on the outside don’t realize what a community this “blogging” world is! Thank-you so much for reading and your shares! Much appreciated!

  6. Thank you!!!! I worked many years and didn’t love what I did. Not I’m a stay at home mom with a BLOG and LOVE it. I also love my blog gin’ friends and community! Xoxo

    • I am so happy to hear that! You have to do what drives you, what motivates you, what you are passionate about! I am glad that you are able to do that and that you have such a strong network of blogging friends, that’s the best part! 🙂

  7. I love being your blog friend:-) I think your writing is wonderful and inspiring/hilarious. The friends I have that don’t blog really don’t understand anything about what I do or the amount of time and work it takes, which is fairly disheartening:( thanks for sharing this!

  8. Jane (Limeade Gal) Reply

    Amen! Awesome post! Couldn’t of said it better! Too good not to share…
    Off to share this one wherever I can

    • Thank-you, Cary. I must admit, I about peed my pants reading your ‘If I Die In a Home invasion’ piece. I read it last night and you had me at the edge of my seat…and then.. the cat. BAHAHA! So good.

  9. Ashley, I enjoyed reading your blog. I have 2 blogging friends…I appreciate your craft.
    As a former teacher, I must make one comment. I tried to find a private way to message you…

    Those “bloggers,” those “Facebookers,” those are my friends and I. It should read my fiends and me…at least you did not put the pronoun before the noun…
    Keep on writing…

    • Thank-you for reading, Susan! I am actually a grammatical nightmare, however, I am slowly learning. Thank-you for the tip! 🙂

  10. YES. They will never understand the absolute thrill of someone laughing or even saying “ME TOO!” about something you wrote. It’s my crack.. <3

  11. I’m fortunate that I haven’t received any of these comments but I have to admit that before I started this whole blogging thing I was one of those article-forwarders that just assumed the stories magically appeared on the site and didn’t often notice the people behind the stories. I’m honored to be included in some of those extensive Facebook chats now & so happy to finally know the stories AND the authors.

  12. I am a nurse who is married to a director of a youth hockey organization and we don’t have kids. We have heard it ALL, it’s like yeah people we get up everyday with the intention of making yours miserable! I love bloggers, it takes balls to allow people to have a glimpse into your life! So I tip my hat to you and all bloggers, especially the ones who tell it like it is…very refreshing!!

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  14. YES to this!!! I’ve now just started referring to my blog friends as simply “friends” to the outside world so I don’t get the eye roll…or the really, really trying not to eye roll face…from others. Some people really get it and others just don’t. Obviously you do and captured it perfectly. Thank you!

  15. Love this. While I’m a non-professional personal blogger, I work in social media for my career. There are a few people who understand the scope of what that means, but most think I hang out on Facebook all day and tweet emojis. I was taking some photos in the office one day for our Instagram account, and a co-worker and our CEO walked by. My co-worker exclaims, “Can you believe this is what you pay her to do? HA!”

    #solidarity 😉

    • I refuse to tweet emojis until they make a dinosaur emoji. 😉 HA! Thank-you so much for your words. And kudos to you and your SM career. It is SO much to keep up with and I cannot imagine how much work that must be. Thank-you for reading!

  16. Great post! I started my blog in August (and still have sooo much to figure out). Reading this makes me realize I should stop being so apologetic when the subject of my blog comes up. I feel my blogging gets trivialized by friends/family. And yes, this does hurt my feelings. Thank you for stating this so nicely, Ashley.

    • I am familiar with the feeling–not by all, but definitely by some. At the end of the day, I just remind myself that it makes ME happy. In the midst of a crazy life, we ALL deserve something that is OURS that makes us happy. Keep doing what you’re doing! Keep writing, learning, and most of all, havin’ fun! The day that stops (for me) is the day I stop. 🙂 xo

  17. Hey, thanks for this I seriously think I’m going mad and my kids probably think the same! I’ve just started writing – It’s soooo therapeutic for me me me!! Love it and stuff the rest of them
    AMEN xx

  18. Hi Ashley, your post speaks volumes for all bloggers. Thank you. I am a new blogger, still trying to learn the ropes. I am overwhelmed with the amount of time, and effort it takes to create (and effectively share) something great to help or inspire those who read my stories. With my blogging efforts, and my soon to be published children’s picture book, I hope to make an impression in the world of food allergies. I am expecting success, but until that happens, I expect to continue receiving unsupportive comments. But that’s OK! I know why I’m doing it, even if there are some who can’t appreciate it.

  19. Oh Smash, you hit it right on the head! So many people scratch their heads and wonder what the hell I’m doing; my husband thinks I’m just fucking around on facebook, but like you, I’m reading blogs, I’m networking and I’m working! Trying to be relevant, trying to connect and trying to learn. I don’t live near any bloggers I know and love, and the other night I had a dream that a blogger who I really think is hilarious called me up and asked me to come to happy hour! I was so thrilled she lived in my town because this blogging thing has led me to the people who are my people and for once in my life, I don’t feel quite so weird.
    Anyway, love to you. You are so funny and see the world in such a beautiful way- I wouldn’t have known that without the words you so carefully craft and publish…
    Great post dino!

  20. I just wrote you a long and amaaahzing comment, and The Internet ate it up. Damn it all.
    Anyway, I just wanted you to know that I’d never have known what a beautiful perspective you have if you hadn’t crafted your words and hit publish.
    Love you to the moon and back dino-sistah!!

  21. Hi Ashley! Bloggers unite! My writing is my craft, and I know a lot of people don’t understand what I actually do behind-the-scenes to be a blogger, but if they really knew they’d be shocked at home much work it is for us all. I love that you wrote this post. It’s got to be said — so thank you!

  22. I also am new to the blogging game and am lucky to have plenty of friends and family who root for me and cheer me on. The one exception? My husband. I’ve been taking a six-month hiatus from my paid client (writing) work to do some “fun” writing. My husband is very supportive except that he NEVER asks or shows any interest in my writing, even though half of what I write is funny stuff about him and I’ve had several submissions accepted on BLUNTmoms, ScaryMommy, etc. Hey, I ask about his boring-ass work life all the time … don’t I deserve some interest from him?! I’ve given up on asking, as the result never changes. So hell yes to friends — fellow bloggers and others — who understand and appreciate good writing.

  23. Heck yeah! Putting ourselves out on the page is both joyous and terrifying and for those of us who have made it our career it can be a little urksome to hear the naysayers time and again who brand it as ‘a waste of time’. My waste of time sends my family on holidays, brings in fabulous toys and makes me smile every damn day. So high fives to you and thanks for linking up at #sharethejoy.

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