There is a dangerous epidemic in America.  Something sinister is creeping into even our best neighborhoods, being hawked on every street corner and tempting our children on playgrounds. A staggering number of people in our nation are succumbing to a new addiction.

Why can’t we just say “no” to pumpkin?

Until recently, you would attend one gathering a year—maybe two—where they were passing the pumpkin. It was easy to politely decline while others partook. No one questioned your preference.

Now pumpkin peer pressure is off the charts.

Is it the season? Back to school? What are we, as a country, lacking that makes us so susceptible to the lure of pumpkin right now?

One driving factor? Pumpkin enablers are everywhere.

And the biggest pusher of them all is Starbucks.

They are encouraging Americans to take a hit of pumpkin every day. Betty Crocker is running a close second, slipping all that pumpkin in their mix boxes.  I mean, who are they trying to kid?  They are encouraging baking, plain and simple.

Sadly, pumpkin is in our schools as well. At lunch time, I bet you can find one kid in ten sampling some pumpkin. And the parents are to blame. Children are just mimicking what they see at home.

We have trained these young minds to think they need pumpkin. That pumpkin is good.

According to Forbes magazine, pumpkin use rose 14% in 2013 and is climbing by the day.  That equals an estimated $350 million good old US dollars spent on pumpkin.

How did it come to this so quickly?

Many folks, like me, have tried pumpkin over the years and just don’t like it.  The users don’t understand us and our disdain for all things pumpkin. 

“A little bit won’t hurt you,” they say.  They don’t respect my limits and the boundaries I’ve set for myself. 

Pumpkin shaming is real, I should know.

But one day, pumpkin will lose its allure. People will see pumpkin as the temporary fix that it is; leaving millions empty and craving. 

Save yourselves, save the children—hell, save the world—and step away from the pumpkin today.






Maureen lives outside Washington DC with her husband, 3 boys and her dog, the only one who really understands her. She shamelessly exploits the chaos of her everyday life for enjoyment and profit. She loves 80's music, Miller Lite and reality TV. She is rarely without a koozie in case someone is kind enough to offer a beverage. Maureen can be found blogging at Montgomery Community Media, in her column for the Town Courier Newspapers as well as online at Scary Mommy, the Mid and more.


  1. Similar to America’s bacon obsession, no? I like pumpkin (and bacon), but I don’t have to take a daily hit or anything like that. 🙂

  2. I am laughing so hard reading this because just this morning my daughter said she wants a pumpkin latte from the money sucking crazy place called “Starbucks”, i like the drink once in a while but people take it too far.

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