According to my doctor, there are months well-known in medical circles as “transitional” periods or times of unrest & discomfort for their patients.

September, for instance is a time for change and new beginnings for many people. The months of January & February (especially here in the Pacific Northwest) are when doctors and counselors see an uptick in patients reporting depression or anxiety. And the holidays, of course, bring their own special blend of loneliness. My own personal kryptonite is first week of April, and April 1st in particular.

This year, April 1st marked the fourth anniversary of my divorce. Not the signed, sealed, delivered official divorce date but the day that my marriage ended. As I’ve stated before, the story of my marriage and its demise belongs to my ex and myself. I am not going to share that story here or elsewhere. For even though I blog about divorce, some details will remain private out of respect for my ex and our children. My memories of that day are more like remembering a nightmare: deep sadness, long-awaited relief, severe regret, explosive anger, inappropriate elation, bitter anguish and a nearly visceral feeling of failure. Unlike my wedding anniversary, there is nothing positive to remember about that day.

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Pam is a Vancouver-based mother of two who writes with honesty, humor & hope about her post-wife life at After working through a difficult separation and divorce. she now enjoys a enlightened co-parenting relationship with her former husband. She started to share her experiences and resources with others who may be going through a separation or divorce of their own.

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