When I was pregnant, my doctor asked me if I planned to breastfeed. I thought about it for a few seconds and replied that I planned to try. This was the entirety of my pre-birth breastfeeding preparation.
The day after my son’s birth, I waddled my way through the hospital halls to the daily breastfeeding class where I rolled my eyes at the earnest instructor who waved a crocheted breast at us as she pontificated on the World Health Organization’s recommendation that babies be breastfed for at least two years. I set a goal of one year, tops, and then I wanted my body back.
My son is celebrating his fourth birthday this week. My son is still breastfeeding.
Before you accuse me of fueling the mommy wars, please know that I don’t care how you feed your baby. I don’t care if you breastfeed for a week, a month, a year. I don’t care if you combo feed or exclusively pump or choose formula from day one. I don’t care how you choose to feed your baby; I care that your baby is fed and I care that you have a choice.
Full-term breastfeeding is my choice. It is my son’s choice. It is a choice that has been called creepy and weird and even abusive. I choose to use my body the way it is designed to be used and I am judged.
I don’t breastfeed my four-year-old to make a point. Breastfeeding has never been about making a statement; it’s just something I do. I’m not breastfeeding my child at you to make you feel bad about your parenting choices, I’m just feeding my kid. I’m making a choice that works for me and my family and I won’t be shamed for it.
The list of why breastfeeding can suck is long enough with the cracked nipples and clogged milk ducts and engorgement; we don’t need to add judgment, contempt, or humiliation. Instead of concerning ourselves with others’ mammaries, let’s support every mama’s right to choose, even if you don’t agree with the choice. Let’s mind our own business and our own boobs.

About the author: Hillary is a part-time serious office person, part-time aspiring creative, and full-time mama of one spirited little guy. She loves kitchen dance parties, all the gin, and people who spell her name with two Ls. She pretends she knows what she’s doing at www.hillarywith2Ls.com

Wannabee BLUNT

Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.


  1. I am still breastfeeding my 21/2 yeae old boy its my choice and I actually dont care what other people say we will stop when we are ready not when people think we should

  2. I pretty much pumped exclusively with my second child. (First kiddo was exclusively formula) We never could get a good latch. I quit pumping after 11 months. I had sooo wished to be able to breastfeed directly and I would have done it a lot longer if I could have.

  3. The thing I really love about being a mother is that we get to choose what WE think is best for our families. Thanks for sharing about what is best for your family and your motherhood!

  4. I have an honest question, and I’m not in any way trying to argue or shame anyone. (I hate that i feel like i need to preface a comment with that!) What are the benefits of breast feeding for that long? I couldn’t breastfeed, not from lack of trying, or anything but physically couldn’t breastfeed. I’ve never researched the pros/cons of breastfeeding for that long. I know how hard it is and I never experienced the “shame” … (aside from the “you’re not breastfeeding? You really should!” Shame.) But I can imagine that there is a stigma and it’s both frustrating and saddening that there is one. Breastfeeding is such a natural thing that I don’t understand why anyone would care either way.

  5. Leslie Kendall Dye

    My child is only just beginning to consider weaning at 3.75 years old. I too have zero energy to explain how/why it came to be, only the energy to say it has worked as perfectly and imperfectly as every other family system that loves and nurtures a child. I can’t say that I am past wanting to explain to ignorant, hateful people why extended, or full-term breastfeeding, as many call it, due to its prevalence in many many cultures, are incorrect. . But I AM past trying. I simply heave a sigh and look back at my happy, well adjusted kid and realize some things are more important than correcting cruel people. I love the brevity of your post; it makes the point. Apologies that my comment is now longer than your post!

  6. Leslie Kendall Dye

    it just depends on how your lifestyle falls out, how your particular kid is. My child always loved nursing, and now we barely nurse, only at night, and I doubt I have milk even. It is a very few minutes at this point, but seems to give her a sense of returning to home base before she is once again climbing trees and terrifying everyone by jumping out of them and running down the street. I think it is her way to tell herself that she can leave home and come back. In time, gradually, she has learned this in many other ways, until at last nursing dwindles and disappears, fading into irrelevance for her.

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