You look beautiful, life’s fine and then one day, you become a grandmother. When my daughter had a boy, I was elated for her and her newborn. I felt love, beauty, and all the nice emotions. But all came crashing down when she said, “Say hi to Granny!”
I was the oldest version of myself now. I felt old in that moment. All my looking good, feeling good, took a backseat and I had that stroke of self-realization of being old. I was overwhelmed and dropped a tear or two (people thought I was too overwhelmed with emotions but it was actually the self-realization that got to me).
Nonetheless, when you accept destiny/fate/biological clock with all the repairs and maintenance, there is only one prominent goal you have – TO TEACH YOUR GIRL TO BE A DECENT PARENT. NOT EVEN GOOD. DECENT! Here are my top 6 struggles as a mother’s mother (I like to call it that):
- Being called grandmother. Shortened it further to ‘Gram’ because it sounds like a name and subconsciously is a measure of some value.
- Being my daughter’s encyclopedia. I have had calls at 4 a.m. when something as simple as baby not asking for milk in the night has been an area for concern. Well, 1) I don’t have a medical degree and 2) Every advice I give to my daughter is anyways outperformed by something smarter and logical that google has to say.
- Being a freelance nanny. Seriously, there is no log maintained and it is a very demanding job. Government needs to mandate caretaking payments to parents.
- No clue why woke parents fret over everything. We had no phones, cameras, or TVs and we raised our children just fine. Or, did we? My daughter would fiddle with her phone while buying an expensive book for her son. The kid hasn’t touched it. How do you tell your kids to stop being a goddamn hypocrite?
- You ought to know. In the middle of frantic calls, you always need to have your answer ready. Note: the daughter is already panicking, and you having no response is going to escalate the matter. In case your suggestion doesn’t work, it kind of takes a toll on your appraisal. Oh wait, you never get paid.
- You ought to cook better. Being a grandmother comes with an inherent responsibility of coming right out of Masterchef. Catering to the whims and fancies of the expected delectable smorgasbord of the two kids (your own being the most challenging) is an apron wearing, recipe seeking task to keep up with.
Though there are challenges, the truth is, it makes your life full of challenges and short term accomplishments. Cheers to all the grams that are in the process of accepting the gray in their hair, the change in their flair and always on their toes for their kids and the kids of their kids.
Pushpa is a woman who likes to observe and comment. Only recently appraised to the role of being a grandmother, she likes to share her tuppence on upbringing then and upbringing now. She likes to spend time on social media and judge others. She likes to give diplomatic answers to political questions. She has interesting ideas on how to make parenting exciting.
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