fathers dayI suspect that many fathers woke up this morning and after a few minutes asked the million dollar question, “Um, honey, where’s my Father’s Day present?”. I bet they were darn surprised when they were met with an angry glare instead of a masculinely wrapped package.

You see, many fathers forget rule number 1 of Father’s Day celebrations: payback is a bitch. Did you forget to buy your wife a nice present for Mother’s Day? Did you, by any chance, suggest that she spend her day taking care of the kids, or even worse, go so far as to book her into a day at the indoor playground with a special lunch at Mickey D’s?

Perhaps you no longer even remember what you did for your significant other on her big day. “Mother’s Day….not ringing any bells here? Wasn’t that back in February or something?”

Um no, it was last month. And while you were filling your mind with the latest stats from baseball spring training exercises, we were muttering reminders to ourselves. Over the sink of dirty dishwater, between loads of laundry and certainly every damn time we changed a dirty diaper, we made ourselves a little mental note: “That man is getting NOTHING for Father’s Day.”

And now here we mothers are on the big day, staring straight into a face of disappointment and disillusionment we hadn’t expected to see until we announced that Santa wasn’t real. And you know what, seeing that look on your faces ALMOST makes up for having missed out on Mother’s Day.

Almost. So clear out some brain space and make a mental note to do better next year. Trust us, you won’t be sorry!


Lynn Morrison is a smart-ass American raising two prim princesses with her obnoxiously skinny Italian husband in Oxford, England. If you've ever hidden pizza boxes at the bottom of the trash or worn maternity pants when not pregnant, chances are you'll like the Nomad Mom Diary. Catch up with her daily on Facebook and Twitter.

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