Is there something in the water?

My neighborhood is a strange one, an anomaly, a miracle of child development.

See, the children in our neighborhood, they are all gifted. They are brilliant, advanced and the best of them.

How do I know this?

It isn’t through any development testing, or demonstration of obvious advanced skills, it is purely parental perspective.

And to tell the truth here, I am really sick of it.

I remember when your child potty trained, and trust me, it wasn’t at 12 months, so please, stop rubbing that lie into other mothers faces.

As well, the obnoxious little bitch of a daughter, her language skills aren’t advanced, she isn’t  “precocious”  she is just obnoxious and rude.

and the fact that your kid can hold a hockey stick does NOT mean he will be the next NHL draft, trust me, it isn’t that hard.

And kids dance . . . please don’t get me started. How many of these little ballerinas will really make it to grand stage? And please tell me why we are spending thousands upon thousands of dollars only have them battle weight issues, female bullying and, in the end . . . failure due to parental pressure?

Yes, all children are special and unique and gifted in their own way, but I am sick and tired of parents putting them on pedestals and raising them to be egotistical  little brats.  Isn’t there something to be said for allowing our children to be raised as normal individuals  able to find and explore their own greatness, rather than having it thrust down their throats and shackled to their legs for eternity?

So put down the camera/chequebook/christmas brag letter for a minute and listen to me:

“Your kids are not gifted.”

They are not better than my kids (or her kids) and will probably not be the next Justin Bieber/Mary Lou Retton/Steffi Gra/Wayne Gretsky. So, Please, back the fuck off and let them become amazing in their own way, because I am going to bet that if you do, they will find a way to be exactly what they want !

And here’s the other thing . . . whatever they do become, be it dancing on the BIG stage during Pride parade, or mopping floors during night shift, raise them to love what they do, and who they are . . .  then I will concede and admit that you did, in fact, raise a gifted kid.