I can’t keep my kids from getting exposed to guns. They are everywhere. You can’t hide from it. Even if I never let them watch TV, they have an uncle who is an officer who visits while on duty to let them see the car.
Even if I never bought the toys for them or took away ones that they received as gifts, they would still see “shooting” on video games.
I take away video games with shooting, but they’ll play at a friend’s houses and they will have guns.
I can’t completely shelter them. I can just teach. I would fight and fight trying to get my son to choose another toy but he doesn’t want to. So, I chose to breathe and try something new.
I pulled the “big brother responsibility” card.
Honey, I’m not to going to take your guns away. I’m not going to ask you to stop playing with them.
“really?”
Yup, you can play guns
You can pretend. You can point at the ground or maybe at their tummy. NEVER THE FACE.
“why?”
Respect.
That’s my answer. Not much different from not pointing a finger in someone’s face (although much less lethal if we are talking about comparing body parts to a glock) I don’t want my son …or my daughter…… to point anything in anyone’s face. Fingers, guns… that’s where my line is drawn in Sharpie ink. To me, that’s where the rules start and finish. Point a “gun” in the face, lose the gun.
After 3 years of trying to find that compromise, that’s where I found my calm. Or calm-like. It just comes down to respect.
If we had guns in our home, my kids would learn to respect them (when they got much older, of course). Respect and use them. Be wise and safe. Never allow them to have them when we weren’t around. Be knowledgeable and know when to use them. Have the skills to protect themselves if need be.
It would be a family decision. A anonymous decision. I’d never force it on them nor would I encourage moments of being maniac and rooster-like HEY MOM, CAN I SHOW MY FRIENDS MY GUN? Hell, no, you may not. It’s not a trophy.
Right now, my son is 5. 5 year olds live to be good/bad/ugly in their play. This mama wants to maintain one aspect of his learning. Disrespect is not an option.
(photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/michaelcomeau/8983314440/”>Michael Comeau</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>cc</a>)
5 Comments
My kids have never been drawn to gun play despite seeing them at friends houses. It could be a gender thing but none the less, no guns for us. However, I’ve heard from friends that if a child wants to pretend to shoot someone or something, they will pretend that just about anything is a gun. A stick is a gun. A straw is a gun. A banana is a gun. Even their fingers are guns. Respect and education is the key. Great post!
Knowledge is power and there’s nothing wrong with empowering our kids.
I love your honesty. And my kids shoots me with anything he can find in the house. But not a gun.
My kids play with them too. They have lights, make noises…my oldest even has a cap gun. I hate it, but they love them…and they’re not allowed to point them at the face either. They don’t know it, but I randomly hide them 🙂
Great article. All of our kids are grown and gone, but, just like I was raised, we. Allowed the kids to play with toy guns and, when they were old enough, we introduced them to the real things. My wife and I made no bones about the fact that guns can kill people when used in the wrong way; however, when a gun is called on to help defend yourself or your property by killing someone who is trying to kill you is a good thing. Studies show that when criminals are shot and killed by the homeowners they are trying to hurt, the crime in that are drops significantly. When those villians are convinced that there is a danger to themselves in committing these crimes, they go somewhere else. This is what I taught my family, and it has worked. So BRAVO to Robot Mommie for the way she is raising her children.