Stranger Things Made Me Feel

Netflix isn’t just for random movies on a night in anymore; their ability to produce a series and release it all at once is a binge-watcher’s dream. As the mom of a toddler, I don’t get to binge-watch things all too often. So, while all of my friends had consumed the entire first season of Stranger Things (and then proceeded to rave all over Facebook about it), I was about 2 episodes in. The Mister and I were able to pace ourselves by watching one episode every night after our daughter had gone to bed, we got really crazy on a Friday and watched 2 episodes (I know, so wild!). Honestly, I’m glad we had to stretch out the experience of watching the show. The mood of series, the mystery, the storytelling were all so well done that having time between episodes allowed me to sit with what I had seen and ask questions about what was coming next.

There was so much of this show tugging on my own nostalgia for the 1980’s (both my own real experience of that time period and the portrayal of the 1980’s on film and screen). There were enough small nods to those films it was playing off of, that you couldn’t help but fall under its spell. Everything about Stranger Things just looked and felt right for what they were trying to do, it was completely captivating. But, while I thoroughly enjoyed this series and I am anxiously awaiting Season 2, I was left with a great feeling of sadness once it was over.

Not sad in that, “what do I do with my life” feeling one experiences after completing a series or a season of show. You know, where you’re convinced no other show will be as good or powerful but you still chase that dragon with other series to fill the void.

We don’t live in a world where kids become buddies who hop on their bikes and disappear all day; where a group of children would have a secret hiding place that no adults knew about. A world where kids could get lost telling each other stories through roleplaying games in a basement for hours on end. One in which, the children come up with their own rules, structures, and consequences for their tiny tribe. The relationships between the core friend group on Stranger Things was so complete: they thoroughly knew one another, accepted each other, and called their friends out on their bullshit when necessary. And I’m just so damn sad that my daughter won’t get to have that. Hell, I didn’t even have that.It really took me a while to understand where this sense of longing and loss was stemming from. At first I chalked it up to the nostalgia factor; but then, I realized it was the child characters who were leaving me with this lingering ache. Deep down, I know that kids don’t really hang out like the ones in the show do and that I wished my child could have pals like that. THAT was what was making me feel so out of sorts from watching this series.

My parents were afraid of the world and only allowed me to experience it in very safe and very small ways as a child. I longed for the freedom to ride away on my bike with my friends or have a secret clubhouse without anyone checking on us. I do feel like I missed out: I never played manhunt in the dark as a kid, I rarely was permitted at sleepovers, I wasn’t trusted to make my own food. As a result, I went to college and had the shattering realization that I had no clue how to feed myself (but that is another tale for another time). 

Growing up, I always assumed I would be different with my own children and let them be a bit more free. However, we live in a world where you can have the police called on you for allowing your child to walk home from school or play in the park without supervision. Watching Stranger Things really pulled into focus the reality that my daughter won’t have the chance to be a kid in the way those kids are (not in the secret experiment, alternate dimension way…the other way).

I want her to have friends she sees face to face and goes OUTSIDE with. I want her to have friends that know her inside and out, who aren’t afraid to let her know when she’s being a jerk, and who create their own group norms and expectations. I want her to have friends who aren’t afraid to be themselves, who have her back and stick up for each other, and who can create whole worlds together with little more than one another’s company. I want, I want, I want…

This is why Stranger Things left me with an ache inside that I couldn’t even put a name to at first. I want a world where all of this is still an option and this beautiful show is a reminder that it isn’t.

(This post originally ran on Texting From The Bathroom)

About the author: Evelynn Moon is a writer, nonprofit professional, and a lover of all things funny. Star Wars, comic books, coffee, and red wine flow through her veins. She lives New Jersey with her husband and daughter. You can find more at Texting From the Bathroom or follow her on Twitter.