I know your coffee is overpriced and your drinks are sugar-ladened cholesterol spikers, but you make me feel fancy.

Mixed in with the hipster 20 somethings in their black oversized glassed and skinny pants are other mamas whose stained yoga pants and dry shampooed top knots let me know that they feel me. Our crew neck sweatshirts with the spit up stains on the shoulders are our war cry to each other.

“Yes, I will take an extra shot in my frappaccino, cute 90 pound tattooed girl with purple hair.” She doesn’t even know how soon gravity will tug on her tightly toned midsection when she hits her 30’s or decides to bear children…the sweet, innocent little balls of life-sucking energy.

That weird green mermaid lady on the cup smiles at me as if to say, “Mama, you are killing it! Your dirty hair and mascara smudges look so fantastic that you are likely starting a new trend!”

No matter how budget conscious our family is, my husband would not dare judge me for buying a $6 frozen coffee because he knows the green straw brings me a comfort unknown by $1 menu drinks or gas station coffee. That stuff is for ametuers. I am a professional overworked and under-rested mama who needs the fully leaded coffee with extra fancy crap in it and words like “fair-trade” and “non-GMO” on handwritten signs behind the barista.

Thank you, Starbucks, for costing me $10 extra when my kids are with me. I don’t mind. You’re worth it.


Brynn Burger
I am a wife, a mama, a writer, a teacher, and a lover of all things outdoors. I live tiny, love big, and laugh always. I write because it’s cheaper than therapy and everyone needs that friend to laugh with at 3am while your yoga pants are covered in nugget sauce and you just found this morning’s coffee still in the microwave. You’re welcome! Check out more at www.TheMamaOnTheRocks.com


Wannabe's are Guest Authors to BLUNTmoms. They might be one-hit wonders, or share a variety of posts with us. They "may" share their names with you, or they might write as "anonymous" but either way, they are sharing their stories and their opinions on our site, and for that we are grateful.

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