I’ve done some pretty exhaustive research over the last few years into how to survive while daddy is away. And by exhaustive, I mean the wild-hair, wild-eyed, why does this damn kid keep waking up every night asking for Daddy kind of tiredness that comes from my husband going out of town.
I really have no idea how single parents do it. They must have some superhero power that gives them the strength to do this day after day. When I run into these individuals, I pretty much immediately fall on my knees and chant, “I’m not worthy” over and over again. I find managing the kids on my own to be a Herculean task that is just outside of the realm of possibility. In other words, I struggle. A lot.
After all of my research into parenting without daddy, I’ve come to one conclusion. The only way to survive, the only way to emerge from this long, dark tunnel of juggling kids, work, life and everything that it throws at me by myself, is to say F the rules.
Yes, you heard me right. F. The. Rules.
I mask my sheer terror behind late bedtimes, picnic dinners in front of the TV, trips to the zoo, amusement park and swimming pool….sometimes all on the same day. We eat out too much, staining our fingers with French fry grease and Heinz ketchup. If it is something that is on Daddy’s “No way, Jose” list, it is on the agenda with a fixed date and time.
I know that this is probably wrong. I realize that by doing this, I am undermining everything Daddy says and does and making him look like the Joker to my Batman. I know it is wrong, but I just don’t know any other way to get through.
How do you survive the long days and nights while Daddy is away?
3 Comments
Yup. go off the rule book and just be. I have always made our times with Dad out of town as mini vacations. It is no comment on him, it just makes it easier on me to relax the rules.
I also did almost no dishes, laundry or housework when he would go out of town.
We don’t have a dishwasher, so I will use as few dishes as I can possibly get away with. Make a common meal and eat it out of a pan together, or just tell the child to go nuts with the Dust-Buster when he’s done eating someplace (usually in front of the TV).
Yup. DH just left this afternoon for 4 days in the wilderness. Before he even left town, I took the kids out to McD’s for lunch. We ate Mozza sticks & other hors d’ouvers for dinner. I also watched 5 hours of TV when the kids went to bed instead of being productive. You know, like writing that blog post that I should have written two days ago, cleaning the bathroom, unloading the dishwasher… I have to be a responsible adult tomorrow & hold it all together, since I’m babysitting 3 other kids. 5 kids under 5. And no adult coming home during the witching hour. Eeeep.